Tuesday, November 15, 2016

"This isn't FUN!" yells my 5 year old, stomping off because I've asked him to do something offensive, like pick up his legos.  Paul and I look at each other, both with raised eyebrows and a shrug on our shoulders  What do we do? How have we gotten to this point?  My oldest two boys don't react unless I've attached a consequence big enough to get their attention.  The house is in disarray.  I'm ornery and I find myself yelling, and I ask myself, how have we gotten to this point?

My children respond in kind.  When I lose my schmidt, so do to they.  They've been yelling more lately, and I can only look to myself.  So everytime I feel anger rise up, I'm going to use that as a reminder for grace and patience and calm, because these are children, and I'm the adult.  It's up to me to teach them how to appropriately handle their emotions.

So today, we're not watching tv.  There's definitely a correlation with screen time and my children's behavior, and we're actually gearing up for something big.  We're going to put the tv away.  In addition, I've also been starting the process of ruthlessly purging.  Just kidding.  I haven't been ruthless yet, because it can be hard to get rid of things.  It takes practice and it takes time to realize that stuff is just stuff, and it currently feels like stuff is in the way of me being a better and happier person and mom.

It's not that our house is too small.  It's not that I need more totes or a better way to organize.  It's that we need. less. things.  There are a couple of problem areas in the house that always tend to collect crap.  There are a couple of drawers in the kitchen that are always a hot mess.  Then the realization yesterday that I have an entire corner cabinet (of my small kitchen) of wasted cupboard space.  So I guess those things are on the to do list today.

I've been discretely chucking my kids broken and crappy toys.  You know, the ones from McDonalds, or the ones bought from the thrift store for to give them something to play with while I shop/look at other people's things that they've been smart enough to part with.  So there's another thing -- stop going to the thrift store to wander aimlessly!  I don't even know how many things I've stored and for how long, only to take them back to the thrift store with THE ORIGINAL PRICE TAG still on them.  You know.  Just trying to make the employees lives a little easier...!?!? What is even happening here?  Why are we in this cycle of so much crap?

So we're getting rid of stuff.  We're cleaning out closets and then organizing spaces so that it actually makes sense, and we're not just storing things that we don't even use.  I have plans for a drastically simpler Christmas and holiday season this year, and I'm actually really excited about it.  Here's to a simpler life, with less yelling and less overwhelm.  

Because guess what?  Life isn't innately fun.  It isn't fair, and it isn't easy.  Life and being an adult is learning how to be responsible, and doing the things that need doing.  The fun comes depending on our attitudes.  There can be fun while we do the things, but sometimes the fun comes after doing the necessary things.  So here's to being an adult.  To doing the things that need to be doing.  To telling our children no in order to teach self control and self regulation.  And to the fun that comes after.

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